Thursday, June 10, 2010


The little amusements in life come to you in odd forms at random times. Sex is an integral part of who we are, no matter how puritanical, no matter how much denial, and no matter how much you don't want to hear about it. I have sex. You have sex. We have sex. Pronouns have sex. Therefore, people engage in sexytimes as it has been dubbed by my friend Chelsea. By the way, just to clear all doubt, I love you Chelsea.

Sex happens and most likely, if not now, or in the past, most people will engage in sexytimes at some point in life. If this is such a given in life, why are people hesitant to discuss it? We like Popsicle and we discuss those. We dislike angry cats, yet we talk about those. It is possible to talk about good and bad things, and while sex can be both and a flexible range of things in between, we do not talk about it. Why? This question is frustrating to me for many reasons: judgmental society, gender double standards, the virgin/whore complex and general immaturity.

The answer I would like to propose, or at least for this example, is the fact that sex involves people. For the sake of this argument, I'm not including bestiality and performing sexual acts on something that is not another human being. I'm not hatin', it just doesn't suit the framework of this argument. The proposition I present is that society as a whole and people are hesitant, or label it a taboo, to talk about sex because it involves people. The caring optimistic romantic in me chooses to believe that it is out of a natural tendency to not want to hurt or offend others, not because we care about perceived reputations, but for the protection of the partner. You did what? With who? She wanted what? Those kind of questions break away the barriers surrounding people to reach their "true" selves. While one's true self is glorious, beautiful and amazing, it can also be subject to high vulnerability.

Talking about, writing about, thinking about sex can reveal things about people. While they may be false, there also exist truths. The truth is real, brutal, harsh and chilling. It can tear friendships apart, turn friends into mournful strangers and continue to exist as a haunting thirsty ghost long after the initial blow is struck, however, it can reinforce the beauty in friendships and remind you of a treasure you thought you lost.

I am aware that I'm getting kind of preachy and "deep" here, but well, this is subject to my ramblings and rants, and no matter how much I'd like to deny it, I have some things on my mind. I am a whole person, I am comfortable with myself and I feel that I am finally getting close again to being able to call myself a good person. I guess ramblings just wanted to flow out tonight. In relationships, from a one night stand to a intense committed relationship, be respectful. Be caring, considerate and courteous to your fellow man and woman. No one likes kicking walls.

On a lighter note, I also think people don't like talking about sex because the male form is floppity. Yes, floppity. No offense boys, but I think you are. We are all complicated, but we get a nice little cover. While it takes two people to make sexytime, a girl doing sexytime by herself is just a bit jiggly, while boy solo sexytime is floppity.

Finally, body image issues can go suck a blowpop for all I care :D


  1. Also, I don't know if this is lame commenting on my own post, but how the heck does it decide the time stamps for these things?

  2. no idea. I'm a little confused about that too.

    Also I'm sick of people making sex something that it's not. Sex is fun, romantic, and healthy. That's it. The way some people talk (or don't talk) about it you'd think that god himself is personally involved. Freaking hype over it is unbelievable.

  3. I don't like talking about what I have or haven't done with past girlfriends and such. So if I ever do talk about it, I'm never going to use names. If I was in a relationship, I wouldn't talk about what might or might not be going on between the two of us. Sex is also personal so while I have no problem talking about it in general or as it affects just me, I don't talk much about my sexy time with others.